Whether you’ve been in the dating game for months or are just cautiously stepping back in, sometimes navigating the world of relationships (and potential relationships) can seem overwhelming. With social media, misleading texts, and mixed signals, it’s hard to read the signs that someone likes you or is just playing with your heart.
The truth is, dating—especially online dating—can feel like sifting through a mess of sand in search of that one piece of gold. And depending on how long you’ve been muddling through, sifting kernel by kernel, you might feel ready to give up.
There are people out there who are genuine, who are looking for something real, and who aren’t afraid to be open and honest about their feelings. When it comes to finding the right person for your life, know that whoever it is won’t leave you guessing, wondering, or questioning intentions.
No more sifting through sand.
Here are four telltale signs that someone likes you.
1. This person makes you a priority.
No more obsessively checking your texts only to find out that your person still hasn’t texted you back. No more absentmindedly scrolling through social media, questioning your worth because you’ve noticed that the person you’ve been talking to has been liking other people’s photos on social media but not yours—so now you’re unconsciously judging yourself and questioning your worth. Nope.
Here’s the hard-to-swallow-but-really-necessary-to-hear truth: If someone likes you, I mean really likes you and is invested in starting or building something real, you’ll know.
You won’t have to question intentions, “likes” on social media, or whether there will be follow through on that call or date. You won’t be left hanging, wondering if things will work out. You won’t have to waste your precious time investing, only to find out the other person wasn’t all the way in.
If you’ve asked yourself or had to Google search, “How can I tell if someone really likes me?” then that’s already an answer in itself. If you’re with someone who actually cares, you won’t have to ask.
2. This person gives you eye contact and intentional listening.
We live in a media-driven world. While this can be a powerful thing and offer connections we would have never been able to access otherwise, it can also be a negative, too. People have become far more interested in appearance (and keeping appearances) than investing in the real or tangible sometimes. And if you’re trying to navigate the online dating world, there’s even more pressure to “keep up” and to succumb to the instant gratification mentality.
While this isn’t always the case, of course, a lot of our relationships and connections have been influenced by this drive. And as a result, people sometimes forget the importance of being present and in the moment with someone else.
If you’re looking for signs that someone likes you, assess how that person is when you’re around one another (or now, in our socially-distanced climate, how attentive that person is when you’re meeting online).
If a person likes you, that person will be invested in the conversation. If a person cares about what you have to say, that person will be giving you eye contact, attentive body posture, and intentional listening (listening with purpose, asking follow-up questions and genuinely focused on what you have to say).
If, instead, there’s distraction, inattention, and flippant responses, you can tell you’re not only being disregarded in the conversation, but you’re not being valued for who you are and what you have to say—and if that’s the case, run!
3. There’s a mutual respect and understanding of where you are/where you’re going.
In the early stages of dating, having the “what are we” conversation can feel overwhelming. But, at some point, it has to happen in order to navigate the future and not waste one another’s time.
Telltale signs that someone likes you is if they’re initiating this conversation, or if they’re actively and willingly participating in figuring out the next step in your “relationship.”
When two people are getting to know one another, there should be a mutual respect and understanding of what both of your intentions are, where you see things headed, and what you’re looking for at the bottom line.
If the person you’re with is excited about having these conversations, it shows that there’s not only investment in the future, but that there’s a desire to keep things going—and that reveals your person’s desire to build and grow something real.
4. There’s a desire for (continued) communication.
At the core of every relationship, regardless of how “real” or “long” or “genuine” it is, is communication. Whether you’re in the initial stages of your online dating and sending your first messages or have been together for years and are trying to navigate your latest fight, communication really is key.
You can tell someone is invested in you by their desire to communicate (even when it’s hard)—not only to continue conversing or spending time with you, but also to build something beautiful. The more open the communication, the more the promise for growth, especially long-term.
Clear signs that someone likes you and is invested in you is their desire to share, get vulnerable, and give you the space to bring your thoughts to the table, too.
Regardless of where you are in your dating or relationship journey, at Birdy, we believe in building genuine romantic and platonic relationships by focusing on personality first. Our app helps you match with naturally-compatible people based on a personality test and traits that align with your heart, your goals, and your beliefs.
To learn more and take our FREE personality test, click here!